My Best Friend Lily

There were lot of mistakes I made while building new relationships. Having a lonely friendless childhood made me extra sensitive towards letting  go of anything. I enjoyed being a victim to this trait of mine.

When in school I had my 1st best friend. Who left me to be with someone more popular. After days of him ignoring me I finally managed to get of hold him and I remember, I cried more than I talked.
Well, I cried because I did not have many friend and losing the only friend was devastating. I was not too good at studies either. To top it I was a bullied kid at school.
Facial hair and ever increasing weight lowered my self confidence. Dancing is what kept me occupied as it got me atleast some appreciation from others at school. But the bullying continued.
As planned I lost a few kilos before my high school. I think I looked better and my confidence level was good enough to atleast walk through the school crowd.

It was 11th grade when I met Lily ( name changed ). She was everything I needed. This might sound a bit shallow but I wanted to be her friend to show her off to everyone in school. She was pretty and a well mannered girl and her US accent was exactly what would have gotten me attention from others if we started hanging out. But after a  few months we turned out become best friends. We were inseparable.
I got through as a Flight Attendant at the age of 18. She was still pursuing her graduation. I joined airline because I knew I again did not fit a typical college setting.
Flying got me new friends. I loved how I could choose to have more BEST FRIENDS.
A childhood dream of having many friends around made Lily and me a bit distanced. I grew closer to other friends. I had a new best friend - Ramanika ( name changed, u can still rhyme it with the real : P). Lily took a back seat. Our friendship started to fade and I did not care.
Lily moved on because I did. She had a new best friend too - Megha.

After years of being loyal to Ramanika I realized it broke over a silly misunderstanding and a big ego clash. I tried going back and apologizing. I beg and cried. But she turned out to be the sweetest girl with the biggest ego I had ever come across. I wish she chose friendship over ego. But she had made up her mind to leave.

Lily works in Canada now. Yesterday while talking to her on Skype I realized how de-stressed I felt. It was almost she sucked all the worry from my system. She always knew how to. It's just that I took time to understand.

Many questions in life are  answered at the very beginning. But a crazy and young mind needs to explore other options only to come back from where it had started only to value it more. So I searched the whole world and found out that the answer was Lily. And the question was - Will I ever have a soul mate??
We all run to find the most good looking pair of shoes.But at the end settle for the one that fits us comfortably . Right ?


Well, today I don't have single friend on facebook blocked or deleted. I leave no opportunity to reconnect with old friends and even the ones who gave me a tough time. Its just one life to live, and I want to live it beautifully.