Iss pyaar ko kya naam doo

Today a friend deleted me from her FB list. Reason - Her long time Boyfriend does not approve of me. It's just not that this story alone has such element. In past I have had girls who have deleted me for the same reason. The boy friends do not approve of me. So if I get a friend request from such people again I know it is either that their love has fallen apart or, no mostly this is the reason these girls and guys get back on the social circuit and add you back.

Love has immense power to make the most clever and sorted people act stupid. A close friend of mine chooses to over look stories of her Boyfriend cheating on her. Love is blind, indeed. Recently when I saw another girl friend of mine not in my list I knew the boy friend must have had some problem with me. They must have fought and I was out. But why do we let love not look like  love anymore ?

I always believe two people should come together and stay together if it makes them happy. If not, people should move separate ways and not waste time.

My cousin updated on Facebook - We don't have to explain we love someone, just show it. I agree so much to this. Infact this somewhere helps me sort out better. So if love exists it shows.

When I went through a bad phase it was tough for me too. I would cry all by myself alone like  a kid but then I cried not because I was made to do things against my will but because I knew I would lose that person if I didn't give in. But I couldn't give in to someones ego. Surrendering in love is what I can do best, but when ego I have to serve to I quit. I quit that one in May 2008.

Another one today sent me a MISS u text. So why did we not miss each other when it was on. Why do we show love when it is gone. I feel it is more like - I know it is over now no point being mean, send something sweet as we are no more accountable to each other, reaching to that expectation won't be expected by each other. May be a quickie might just come my way - See this is what I look at it as. You guys reading might have your own views. To this sudden text out of the blue I replied to with tonnes of smileys =D =D =D No words.

We are yet waiting for Amit to return. 25th August marks Kittu Damini Amit and my one year completion of knowing each other. We totally rocked 2012. I would ever be so thankful to these guys to have stepped into my life.

We are now planning for the 31st party. I'm sure it going to fun with some good friends around. I will post some pictures here to show you guys what I did on new years.

Stay tuned !

A weekday well spent

12th Dec 2012 turned out to be quiet an eventful day for me.

I met Neil ( my gym friend ) at the ... gym (lol) after a long time. We walked back from gym till K-star so we could catch up on each others life.

While waiting for the bus I was surprised to see Karishma and Shivankit in Chembur.
Neil took off from the bus stop while I accompanied these two non-chemburkars to Kharghar where we were joined by Kittu.
Kittu and I had still so much to talk about Mussoorrie but seemed we were boring the intelligent lot of our group so we engaged in topic best for the foursome.

Straight from the gym my stomach was shouting to have some protein intake so my friends from Kharghar took me to a beautiful place called Tava. We all relished on our Sholay kabab and Lassooni Kabab and headed to CBD to meet the 5th person from our group - Damini (lol).

She carried with her 24 double trouble and we ended the day on chocolaty note. Why does the unplanned days work the best ?

Daddy Dearest

I'm continuously striving to see the positive in every aspect of my life. But it's not always easy.

Belgium 2009

I was 18 when I got through my 1st and only real job. It was also my 1st interview ever and my father had accompanied me. He had full faith in me but I doubted the world outside my colony. Getting through an Airline job was tough especially when my colony was the only world I'd ever known. I had nothing to lose hence staying positive came easy to me. And it worked.

For my interview I got a suit stitched and my dad readied my documents. I remember he had also accompanied me to the passport office at Worli. At that point I was religiously preparing for that one question - So, tell us something about you  ? And I'm glad it was asked in each round by different people.

He had waited for hours outside the building for me. When I finally stepped out to give the big news he calmly replied - Mujhe Toh Pata Tha (I knew it) !!! He was the happiest I could tell and boasted about my achievement for the next 4 years until I quit.

First Class Service Training 2008

He hated my decision to quit. He had rightly warned me about the change of lifestyle post this job. It did get tough for me as I shifted from Rickshaw to Bus and from London to Lokhandwala. But flying had to come to an end.

Flying was special. It was nothing I imagined it to be and everything I couldn't have possibly dreamed about ever. The flight attendants job was one of the best things that happened to me. It gave me more than I could have asked for and I'm ever so thankful to the company. Quitting that job put an end to certain insecurities but on the other hand it gave way to some new ones.

Buckingham Palace 2007

Today I think I had more fire in me at 18 then now at 25 - No pun. I was passionate about becoming something in life until over exposure spoiled me. My life - and all our lives -are filled with challenges that make it difficult to always stay positive. I want to be like the horse with blinkers. It sees only what's in front and keeps going. I think I need to focus better. Or maybe I'll just ask my Dad to accompany me to Karan Johars office. His company might just work again you see. And the horse and the philosophy can go get some fodder.



Anyway, let me check - Dadddddddddd....

Insecure Basket

When Lily called up to wish me on my birthday she had a big news to share. She said her sister has found her a good match and she is certain that she is marrying him. It felt like a thoughtless decision taken on the basis of her current hectic work schedule and lack of socializing. But the truth about my angst was that I was insecure yet again.

When Lily left for Mexico nothing else seemed same as before. I made new friends but couldn't repeat the same bond with anyone. So the thought of sharing Lily with someone was upsetting. I thought I was losing yet another great friend. I felt very insecure and doubted if anyone understands friendship like I do. I was certainly not making any sense.

One of my friend Shakshat once asked me to not trust anyone but my own self. I wondered how could I completely give or receive love without trusting anyone ? Did that logic mean I can hurt anyone or act irresponsibly and back off by saying - I had told ya not to trust me !! Friendship means more to me so I bid him a mental farewell ( taking into account his other antics too ).

I was told I'm a great friend to have around. A Virgo all the way, I'm great at giving advice and I almost love unconditionally. So when I got closer to someone new Aneeka stopped hanging out with me giving lame excuses. It was unfair and drained me emotionally.

After days of avoiding I met Lily again on Facebook. She seemed as absorbed with the new development in her life but was worried if I felt left out. She was quick to show she cared and it instantly made me happy again. Her words made me realize that what we share is exclusive and will remain one forever. And what her to-be-husband will provide her is what I won't take responsibility for.  What if I found someone ? Her reassurance was all I needed to understand why the whole world left and she stayed to become my best buddy ever. We are priceless.

Well, friends are friends because they share something very stupid in common and not because things they don't. Bad intention are unforgivable but a friend can always be forgiven. I realized I had to ignore differences and give my friends a lot of space to create a beautiful bond. I shall never ever be insecure about losing my friends because the real ones will always stay even if I goof up big time or act stupid.

So there I was cool as a cucumber understanding fraands and fraandships.

( Names of people and places are changed )

Missing : Tasneem Songerwala

Love is missing someone whenever you're apart, but somehow feeling warm inside because you're close in heart !

I was 17 when I 1st stepped out of my colony.

Everything outside BARC walls fascinated me. I was that guy who 1stly never had friends and when I did I did not hang out with them much. I avoided going in crowd. I found everyone my age to be mean or may be I was ultra sensitive. I very well fit the introvert description and certainly was a bit bitter to have had no friends. I just couldn't trust anyone forget about opening up.

But this story is about that stunningly beautiful lady with a more beautiful heart who turned out to be a strong and trustworthy anchor to my wandering teenage soul. It was a turning point in my life.

( May 2005 ) One afternoon early to the class I sat inside the Air-Conditioned admins office when I saw her walk in. She looked no ordinary. A diva in every sense. I died and reached the sweet haven when she turned around and asked others looking at me - Who is this young gentlemen. I almost peed in my pants. If it qualifies then that was our 1st interaction ever.

I'm Tasneem Songerwala, I'm your aviation instructor'' she introduced herself with a heart melting smile as our jaws dropped. I remember she had worn a pista green slim fit formal shirt and a formal brown knee length skirt with a belt. She had a glamorous existence and she knew it very well.
I was sitting on the corner seat smiling ear to ear because Ms.Magical was now going to be my instructor for next one year.
I left no opportunity to impress her and soon I was her blue eyed boy. Everyone in the class envied me.
14 years of flying experience and travelling the world oozed out in every small gesture of hers. She talked flirtatiously and we never had a dull moment in her class. What made Tasneem Ma'am strike a cord with all the students was her sense of humour that would have us rolling on the floor. My favourite would be her inflight stories.

Once she asked Hanika to leave the classroom because both of us couldn't stop laughing and I, she clearly knew was at fault. Moments like this reaffirmed that I was indeed her favourite, very clearly.

She managed to make me believe that I wasn't an outcast. The introvert in me was dying and she understood me like noone else ever did outside my family. At home I was a tiger but now there was a strong need to be accepted by the outside world. So when she came along I surrendered. I was awestruck but now I respected her more for seeing the real me inside.

Half way through the year came a sudden halt to this journey. She announced her exit from the academy. She was leaving India for good. Almost all of us cried the day she broke the news. This was the 1st time I saw her sad and soon she was gone. I wasn't prepared for it. I was hurt and somehow felt left out all over again.

Years went by and I missed her more every passing year. Wondering if she remembered me. I wanted to share so much with her. But she had vanished without a trace.

(2008) Years later I saw her at Mumbai domestic airport. Ofcourse where else could I have possibly met her. I was in uniform. It was exactly how I wanted her to see me. With every stride I walked faster. As I came closer I realized it wasn't her. A little disappointed I moved ahead with a big smile. It didn't matter if it wasn't her just her thought left me feeling so positive and rejuvenated for the rest of my life.

Once I troubled her to an extreme that I kept sending her voice-mails because she wouldn't  pick up my phone. I also remember how she failed me in a presentation because I assumed she would never fail me. But she did. It was 26th July 2005.

When my friends say missing someone is so painful I correct them and say missing someone is the most beautiful feeling. It can only get you smiling.

Tasneem ma'am lives in my heart and I'm sure one day I'll meet her in person too. For now half my prayers are answered. How ?

One fine day last year (2011) something unbelievable happened. I got a Facebook request from her. I smiled I cried I smiled again. It was a surreal experience to see her again, virtually though. I think she took time to recollect my face. But then that also makes me think if I added her on Facebook. Guess the excitement left me with no memory of the actual. I had my folks right behind me with their chin on both my shoulders looking at her snaps. Finally they had a face to the name Tasneem Ma'am.

(August 2012) 17 to 24 and she is my most favorite person on earth. A part of my peronality when you meet me still and will always reflect her. A lot of me today wouldn't have been there if I never knew her. I still trouble her with my side of stories and the connection just seems exactly how it was in 2005.

It's beautiful how some people walk into your life out of nowhere and leave such a big impact. From being introvert to not so introvert now I have come a very long way. It was Tasneem Songerwala for me, my angel. Do you have someone like her in your life too ?

La Casita, Calangute, Goa

We chose to stay at La Casita, Calangute. The pictures online suggested a grande affair at reasonable rates. Upon arrival we realized the heaters didn't work and soon the electricity supply shut. They did not even have their own  power inverter. All the rooms were still being cleaned and took almost 2hours to be readied. The walls in my room were stained and it smelled nasty. The towels were worn out and furniture broken. When confronted to the manager - Priscilla she said she had no idea what the agent Cris had spoken to us. Keeping our cool we ignored that the hot plate didn't work properly, and even the few available appliances were rusted and dirty.

Next day a we rented a Gypsy that broke down on our way back from Curlies. Priscilla told us about the snag in the car after we had reached our destination so it didn't make sense quitting the whole  fun halfway and the car hadn't yet given any problem yet until we were to leave. We could have taken a cab to hotel and abandoned the Gypsy. But we stayed waiting for help from La Casita. Till 2.30 all of us including 4 girls were in the middle of no where.


When finally the help came it was Prisciallas husband fuming at us to have made him move his butt so late at night. La Casita does know how to make their guest come back again and again to them.
She did pay part of money to us but didn't leave an opportunity to come across not so guest friendly. So much in a country where we say ATITHI DEVO BHAVA. But this is in Sanskrit. Konkani anyone ???
Goa has so many hotel to choose from. So now u know which to NOT go to.

Hotel - La Casita
Location - Calangute
Rate - Rs.2,500/night 2BHK ( off season )
Review - Skip it
Manager - Priscilla
Agent - Cris

''I made out with her 2years back''- said a coocoo

''I made out with her 2years back''- said a coocoo.  My jaws dropped in disbelief. Would I even trust an acquaintance who talks about my friend. I don't think so. Give me solid facts to start to even pay attention. One thing I know for sure is I'm not going to confirm this with my friend ever. Because I accept that truth has many versions and I leave it to that.

But what if I were to believe this male brag I-fucked-that-pussy really happened. But then I would only be doing so to get even with her. Go live your life I don't care. I'm a person who would not divulge every aspect of my life too. The reason being - Fear. Fear of many kind.

In 2010 when I quit my job I was in serious grip of fear. If I stayed with the job I would be stuck forever. And if I leave I might not have another job. For some quitting a difficult relationship is too hard. There is fear no. 1 - If I stay I would never be content. Fear no. 2 - After this if I don't get anyone. Fear makes us take worst decisions. We often end up making weakest decisions under fear.

''Some losses feel devastating when we experience them and sometimes, the gain isn't proportionate to the loss. But somehow, we survive in the wake of most every storm. Whether we thrive is up to us. That's a choice we need to make proactively, not in response to what we fear, but in response to what we genuinely want.'' - Tiny Buddha

So must have been some kind of fear in her to have shied away from discussing. Fear does kill lot of great existence. I feared losing out on great relationships so I did not say some truths. But then I see the point here as what went wrong when  I feared in front of some that had limitation of understanding. So I shall not re-do what I had faced. I shall extend -  trust.  Why ?? Because  I'm a survivor of fear.

Pervs

           

How uncomfortable women feel in local bus when men drop their eyeballs in their cleavage or when men try to put their gun on their shoulder to shoot. This is just a part of how horny Indian men get on the go. All in a country where we boast of being oh-so-shy about sex. It's almost like it doesn't exist. So, God actually drop babies when mama dada are fast asleep. It's true It's true. So much we trash Sunny Leone, Rakhi Sawant for their ''boldness'' and then ban telecast of Dirty Picture too. Lame. After all its India. Here kids, teenager know nothing about sex. Let me say it again - It's true It's true NOT.

Sex is a part of our life. And if it doesn't interest us us Indians then  we need to ASK THE SEXPERT.  No wonder we come across EXOTIC to westerners. After all so unbelievable we portray ourselves . Common now lets stop pretending or stop groping each other in public. Choose one.
Its simple, the more you suppress it the more curiosity. I wouldn't blame anyone, not even two straight men, going berserk over rubbing each other in a crowded bus or train (I excuse parties, it always with consent there, mostly).
We are sex starved, PERIOD ! Next time notice the number of head turn when a girl walks in. HOT or NOT. I swear I think its totally normal. But why that frown by the middle aged men, when you guys checking out anyway. Accept it. See now that's the problem. Better was the judge of that contest ( which I was part of ) who openly called the then-yet-to-be-winner in his car for a night over.

Let me talk specifically about my favorite city in the world and my home - Mumbai. We live in tiny houses. We haven't heard of privacy and space at all. The family eats sleeps and watches TV together. Indian values at its best. Right ? No. We are at limitation of space.  Life here in this city leaves us with no time. So sex is forgotten or simply slides down to the last thing in the priority list and venting out those urges becomes next to impossible at home. The only breathing time to look around for us becomes commuting in bus or train. Traffic here makes our 5mins journey 50mins, so what do we do with all the hotness available around in a crowded closed bus or train ? ummm ...I remember Daler Mehndi's song to describe this one - Mein Kardi Rub Rub Kardi.

Hanika was scratched on her shoulder by two boys on a fast bike. Another friend who complained how she couldn't get down a crowded bus without being groped. A rickshaw driver tries to take advantage of a foreign nationality. The heaped up sexual urges comes out in a very violent ways that hurt woman emotionally or/and physically. Why women, even I face model coordinators time and again. Okay now stop making up your mind about my profession. Sigh !

Like all other emotions sex exists. It's like hurt, suppressing it leads to mental trauma. Often suicide. Likewise works the sexual urge.Why does moral police disagree. We stop our daughters to step out in the evenings, to do overnights or simply to go on trips with friends. What are we scared of ? They might end up having sex ? Might get molested or be taken advantage of ? Well, this all can happen anytime and anywhere. So instead build a rapport of trust. Better ?
And the rest can go on putting down JISM 2 posters. And jerk off in their washroom remembering all that they saw at Sunnyleone.Com.
So much we pretend in a sex starved country like ours. Time to face it. Boo !

My Best Friend Lily

There were lot of mistakes I made while building new relationships. Having a lonely friendless childhood made me extra sensitive towards letting  go of anything. I enjoyed being a victim to this trait of mine.

When in school I had my 1st best friend. Who left me to be with someone more popular. After days of him ignoring me I finally managed to get of hold him and I remember, I cried more than I talked.
Well, I cried because I did not have many friend and losing the only friend was devastating. I was not too good at studies either. To top it I was a bullied kid at school.
Facial hair and ever increasing weight lowered my self confidence. Dancing is what kept me occupied as it got me atleast some appreciation from others at school. But the bullying continued.
As planned I lost a few kilos before my high school. I think I looked better and my confidence level was good enough to atleast walk through the school crowd.

It was 11th grade when I met Lily ( name changed ). She was everything I needed. This might sound a bit shallow but I wanted to be her friend to show her off to everyone in school. She was pretty and a well mannered girl and her US accent was exactly what would have gotten me attention from others if we started hanging out. But after a  few months we turned out become best friends. We were inseparable.
I got through as a Flight Attendant at the age of 18. She was still pursuing her graduation. I joined airline because I knew I again did not fit a typical college setting.
Flying got me new friends. I loved how I could choose to have more BEST FRIENDS.
A childhood dream of having many friends around made Lily and me a bit distanced. I grew closer to other friends. I had a new best friend - Ramanika ( name changed, u can still rhyme it with the real : P). Lily took a back seat. Our friendship started to fade and I did not care.
Lily moved on because I did. She had a new best friend too - Megha.

After years of being loyal to Ramanika I realized it broke over a silly misunderstanding and a big ego clash. I tried going back and apologizing. I beg and cried. But she turned out to be the sweetest girl with the biggest ego I had ever come across. I wish she chose friendship over ego. But she had made up her mind to leave.

Lily works in Canada now. Yesterday while talking to her on Skype I realized how de-stressed I felt. It was almost she sucked all the worry from my system. She always knew how to. It's just that I took time to understand.

Many questions in life are  answered at the very beginning. But a crazy and young mind needs to explore other options only to come back from where it had started only to value it more. So I searched the whole world and found out that the answer was Lily. And the question was - Will I ever have a soul mate??
We all run to find the most good looking pair of shoes.But at the end settle for the one that fits us comfortably . Right ?


Well, today I don't have single friend on facebook blocked or deleted. I leave no opportunity to reconnect with old friends and even the ones who gave me a tough time. Its just one life to live, and I want to live it beautifully. 

Fashion can be purchased at Zara, style can't be.

Sunday when I left home I hardly knew it was, 1stly, Sunday and to make matters worse sale season.
Palladium was flooded with people.

I dislike shopping. One quick walk and if I don't like anything I leave.
I was at Zara too and tried walking through as fast as I can. But I couldn't. The rush was insane.
More than clothes I checked out people around. There were different size people of all age and from different sections of the society. What united them all was the illusion of a BIG brand ( in Mumbai ) Zara and a positive thought that clothes make a Man. Wrong.
They all looked fashion conscious. If not fashionable. I shall not mention class and style quotient in them. Somehow it didn't come across hence this blog.
As I looked at men around in the Zara Men section I realized they all had dressed up to shop ( at a sale ). I saw how everyone wanted to pick the best irrespective of their body type. Level of fashion in clothes should match the level of fashion in you. Its an EPIC fail when fashion level of the clothe is more than you personal level of fashion. Most Fashion conscious men mimic fashion straight from a fashion magazine or movies. We Indians don't have a very fab body to flaunt these clothes. Iam just being very honest about it. But we certainly do a good job with Indian wear. Why ? Because we are confident in wearing that. We understand the style, silhouette, cut and fabric. But we don't understand western clothes as good. And Indian men are further away from understanding the nitty gritty uber fashion.
Every guy present there had dressed to kill. Dressed up shop ? Really. They were party ready. Tight pant, a half sleeves printed tee, loafer and nicely trimmed hair to mention few. 10 on 10 for the effort to look up market and fashionable. But they all failed.

Some men dress well. Its mostly those who think fashion is for women and play safe. But this sounds boring to some. And enters the modern fashionable man. These men try stealing fashion from all the possible sources. This might work but only when these efforts don't come across as effort. But some men fail like I said before because the outfit never looks part of them. ofcourse because your wardrobe has very few of these kind which they wear for special times like... Shopping. They certainly were trying to impress people around with their clothes, shoes and watches screaming- Iam Fashinable. Look at me.
Men should always keep their fashion quotient high, no doubt. But lazy weekend occupations like shopping should not have flashy dress code. Unless you college student or aspiring model.
Being careful while choosing your outfit is the key word. Making your most expensive outfit look eased out on your body serves the mantra. I won't specify colour but nothing that is gaudy or blingy works for men, esp. on lazy weekends. Avoid tight fiiting clothes if you don't have the best physic. It should be just the right fit. Not to tight not too loose.

We all might not have a perfect body but there are certainly atleast one type of clothe that suits us. Wear that. Find variations in that. Look for different pattern in that. A different fabric. A different colour.
Always compensate. If a thing on your body is bright wear a light thing to go with it, Tight then another thing loose, if your pant is too much printed or has too much texture choose sober tee. Compensate. You don't want to look like you are going for audition in Andheri West. Right ?
Fashion is so readily available today. So you can have a perfect tee, pants, shoes but then that would be perfect piece chosen which necessary doesn't mean it would look good on you. All good expensive things put together but still not good enough. Why ? The answer is as simple. Fashion can be acquired but style is innate.
When buying an outfit think. Being true to oneself is the key word. Get inspired from around and from within when choosing your outfit. Understand your background and your personality. Your choice of clothe should not be the one that's affected by the awesome looking clothe on the mannequin. It should be something that enhances your appearance and avoids making you look frivolous.

Stay true to what suits you and what you can justify. Look for you in a outfit and  PLEASE  stop crowding at malls. =) 

My Grey Zara Bermuda

That Zara Bermuda =I

My friend sent a Zara link to me and asked me to check if it might interest me. Ofcourse Zara does interest me. They make clothes for me. And are cheaper as compared to the way they look. So why not !

My 1st Zara was ever was a Carbon Black Semi Formal Jacket. Its looked so sexy. I paid 4500rs for it. And I felt it was way cheaper than anything I would have gotten around Mumbai. It was Zara for god sake is what I thought at that point. Now don't judge me on this. Iam a poor fellow from a developing country without a steady job. Please consider ! =(
Well two wash and Zara gives way. Damn ! Now may be I realize why cheaper. lol. The Jacket still rocks my Wardrobe but this grey Bermudas that I got them made me sad . I guess they expected a more rich customer to have picked it up who dry cleans alsways. So when I put it in the washing machine after the 1st use the stitch from one side of the leg came off. I was left with  no option but to throw it in archives section of my wardrobe. But it was  until my Dad came back from his vacation and stitched it for me. Wallah. As good as new. And I didn't have to pay him. Priceless. Difference between Love and Business. Right ?
When Zara quotes a price to a piece of clothe it seems unreasonable. I swear I want that fashion but I hate it when after two washes Zara starts to look old. And swear more than money part who would want to keep giving their everyday clothe to Dry Clean.. not me. Iam kind of not interested in stopping by at a Dry Cleaners place.
A few days back a friend of mine was to go to Milan. He asked me if he could buy me something from there. May be something for Zara. How does he know my choice 0_o. 1stly what I got to know from the offer by this friend was that Sales are common at this time of the year all over the world. And 2nd discovering, clothes are cheaper abroad. Almost a 1000rs less.
From 2006 to 2010 I got my clothes from London. It was for the same simple reason that the clothes we cheaper there. Same with I phones. Hai na ?
For the size of my pocket I suppose Zara fits just right. Its in sync with my choice of colour and cuts too. Check my wardrobe and its filled with all grey. And the toned down colours of Zara Men work for me. But the quality offered can be better.

Info -
Zara in Mumbai was inaugurated by Kareena Kapoor ( irrelevant right ? )

Zara outlets in Mumbai-

1- Palladium, Parel.

2- Infiniti, Malad.

Price-

Expensive to Moderate

Quality-

Passable 

Collection-

Ooh La La  

Could Have Been Worse

Bungalow we stayed at

I rushed to the Bungalow and shut the bathroom door. With the clothes on I put the shower on. As the thin and dead force of water from shower ran down my face I looked in the mirror in disbelieve. I didn't believe I was alive. I looked at my face in the mirror. It looked like a separate body, full of human feature but without soul. I left a piece of me at that lake.
On Holi 2010 when me and my other three friends planned a time away from family and friend turned out to be the most dreaded day of our life.
I was tired so I chose to take pictures and record video of my other three friends playing in the lake. As I watched Hanika through the lens I shouted and admired the cute expression on her face. But then she vanished. So did Amit. He was trying hard to communicate from inside the water. He certainly looked harrowed. Within a split second I had Sooh shouting at them with fear in her voice and pleading them to stop acting and put an end to it. But it was far from what I took time to realize. They were drowning !
My knees felt weightless. All of a sudden my body felt so warm from inside with tremble in my posture. I sat down on the shore. I could see Hanika and Amit drowning and I could hear Sooh shouting for help. And I had lost the ability to speak or shout.

That Kalmuha lake

I crawled towards the water in hope of extending help. But they were far from my reach. As I tried harder I fell right in the lake, the deep part of the lake. The shallow shore was no more under my feet. Soon I was being pulled in the deep still lake. Our only savior was panic stricken frail Sooh. As she approached us she got pulled too. So four of us, all in the isolated lake of Kamsheth, drowning.

This lake was covered with only mountains and a slight glimpse of our Bungalow. As we struggled for our lives trying hard with every possible force to stay afloat it all seemed futile. We were all drowning and it was a reality. Matter of minutes the scene had changed. The smiles were gone and the expression  on our face suggested - Death.
I kept looking at the quickly disappearing world. It almost felt like the curtains were closing on me. The movie was over. I looked all around. It was so quite and peaceful. I didn't see a single leaves move or a bird fly by. My whole life story was in-front of my eyes. From the time I remember my life till this day when I was drowning. I also saw the expression on our parents faces when they would see their childrens bloated dead bodies. I saw our room in the Bungalow being inspected by the police. I saw so much in the that short span of time. I told myself - this is it Navin. U were suppose to die drowning. This is how it was planned for you. 

I looked behind Hanika was already far away being pulled further inside. She was the one who was struggling the longest. Soon Amit vanished too. It was Sooh and me struggling harder to live.

Morning. Before hanika arrived

As we all sat in the car that evening to go back home from Kamsheth to Mumbai we all looked out of the car. I remember looking to the furthest my eyes could see. We joked, we cried. But the best part we were talking. It was in all sense an accident. We are matured and responsible individual to be quoted as being frivolous for what had happened to us that afternoon. The incident kept flashing infront of me. While struggling in the water I realized we all certainly panic stricken. Despite being a trained swimmer and having learnt buddy swimming back in 2005 I never knew I would have actually required it one day. A numb mind thought swimming was the last option to save my life. Glad I realized I could swim. As I started swimming towards the shore Sooh held my right shoulder. I put my hand in the water to look for Amits. His hand still extending upwards from inside the brown coloured water expecting for a miracle to happen. I blindly looked for his hand inside water and got hold of him. Every stroke towards the water were harder for life. 

When I finally felt the land underneath my foot I screamed - Breath guys. We are saved.

At the shore

Hanika says that really pulled her out of the shock. They all sat on the shore and I rushed to the Bungalow. I did not want to waste a single second close to the bloody lake.

Four of us look back at that time and smile. We all have tackled it in our different ways. This certainly is a 2nd lease of life.  I have shared this experience with close friends and family. And my friends certainly know how to lighten it up for me. We always laugh on how Hanika still believes that God pulled her out from the water. Poor Amit never gets his due. haha. Jokes apart this incident certainly thought me to value life better and cherish these rest three morons more. Hence even when I would be on the biggest ego trip I would choose my friendship with them over anything.



Cheers to life !!!

NOM NOM

Situated in the busy suburb of Andheri, on the Juhu-Versova Link Road, one might miss Nom Nom quite easily, unless one is specifically looking for it.  NOM NOM made for a most wonderful memory. It didn't need reservations neither we had to wait for our turn to enter, because of it being fairly new and a hidden location. We entered and are so glad that we did. The atmosphere is cool, with  wooden and partly cushioned wall and eclectic decor. There is not too many tables hence you can have a very very cozy and private time. It is difficult to describe all the great flavors of everything we had, so I will post some pics to drool over. The service was almost perfect, minus when the waiter didn't understand my order and got me Pepsi ( ignoreable ). The good food made up for that service glitch, though. This is a must place to dine when in 7 Bungalow. The small area certainly gives it a thumbs up, the staff is sweet always trying to impress and the soft lighting added to this great experience. A good place to go on a date maybe. Though the downfall could be the expensive food. But again the experience can make up for it. For me, I hope to dine at Nom Nom again soon.

..Food ordered -

..Chicken Salad ( a must try ) - 180rs
..Veg. sushi - 400rs

..Wasabi Water Chest Nuts - Don't remember       

..Saki Beer

Chicken salad

veg. sushi

Wasabi Waterchest Nuts

Timings: 

7:00 PM to 1:00 AM

Food Type: 

South East Asian

Price: 

 Expensive

Features: 

Large Group Friendly, Notable Beer List, Notable Wine List

Ambiance: 

Fine Dining

I was an Angry Bird & I hated flying

Yesterday while walking through a busy road I met an ex-colleague of mine. He was on his bike. We chatted until the signal lasted. The conversation was the usual what I always get from everyone. He asked if I enjoyed modelling better than flying. It was a tough comparison to make and I was dumb found. I had more expressions than word. I swear I couldn't crib anymore about flying as a career.
Sometimes when I look back at my time in the airline and chat with colleagues on Facebook I find it to be a cool place where I used to work. But I think deeper into it and I take a high jump out of the whole thought process. It was certainly a tough job keeping in mind that we all were literally in our teens when recruited. It certainly got worse when I met other with like mindedness and Bollywood dreams. Well, I was one of them. So I happily quit to become Shahrukh Khan of the NextGen. Iam seriously kidding about the SRK part. =I
What I miss about flying is not flying. I think I miss a job and not flying. Having a job that gets you a constant salary is what I miss but not flying. Swear the salary didn't do justice to what I thought of myself then. But then it kept coming in. Right !
Here I might do one assignment for a big brand and I get paid as much. But then I miss having a hectic life. No I swear flying kept me busy. But its not the flying that I miss. Again I resurrect its the no-time-on-hand I miss.
Your job is certainly you. Everything about you comes from your job. That pride in your walk, the way you talk to a waiter at a restaurant, the way you look at a stranger, the way you take out your credit/debit card, it all comes to you from your job. I've lost a bit of that pride u see. Your job is you. Its make 80% of who you are.
Today I wouldn't want to go back to flying. Because for me it still sucks. Its certainly a job I chose when I was 18years old. At 24 I feel I have more talent to return to the industry.
I'am glad its no more a set life. I wait for a bus for almost an hour but I won't take a rick. Seeing the real life seems more beautiful. Not having a job has made me more real. And certainly has helped me have more character to myself. I see my personality talking for me not my expensive gadget or material. I feel real and actually 2012. This is the real shit.
I think it's things when gone are missed the most. My job got me enough satisfaction ( the societal  satisfaction I guess ). Missing the job part is certainly what I'am sharing. But then I'am again scared for people to jump to conclusion that I might be regretting leaving flying.


I don't miss flying. I miss having a job. I miss being oh so busy. 

So next time when I meet an ex-colleague who asks me if I miss flying. I will certainly talk all good about it. But that I want you to know is my love for what made me. Something that contributed majorly in my life.
So I won't compare.

Just dress up both the ugly ducklings when speaking to others. And beat the hell of out each one of them when depressed. 

Bitch Please !

Today is kind of a weak day. I mean letting people affect me is been the oldest problem I've faced. No ! I've hardly made any attempts to overcome it. Iam hyper and Iam sensitive. This is what I hear from people about me so I share again the same from my mouth. See I told u I don't see it. But may be the ones who think this way have affected me to say it. Need a solution to this. Like right now !!!
I sit with my tea and Good-day biscuit. I don't care right now the amount of sugar the biscuit holds. When Iam down and low nothing matters. I dont mind seeing the weighing scale going up tomorrow. Because right now Iam in clutch of the moment.
I've always been a victim to my own self. I give a lot being a good friend or to people I've LOVED. And then expect back too. Only to love them so much more. 
I had this friend who I gave another chance. But like its already said by someone clever  - It was like giving the person an extra bullet because the bullet missed me the 1st time. Well to be honest I've warned about this friend since almost 6 years we've known each other. But then again, because I had read somewhere when I was young - Love unconditionally, because its the only way to live fully. So I love 100% and hate 200%. haha. That's screwed up. Right ? No.
There are moments when I want people who took advantage of me to give back all that I had offered them in kind. But in cash. How insane I might sound here.But what a good way to settle the hurt. The Hurt Game sounds better. I suppose more dramatic. Like me. 
As the God wanted me to know about the lie of this friend I was sent to a floor above of the building where I hadn't really ventured in past few weeks. So yeah ! As I spoke to this other person I was surprised by the story he had to share. This was completely unplanned atleast from my side. I was told that this ''supposed'' very good friend of mine had come to the city. And did not tell us or rather me. X ( that friend ) was here for an audition and gave a very bad shot. X failed to even emote. How sad is that. I say it was the Karma that froze Xs face in-front of the camera. haha.
Well why hide the visit from me. But the crime was committed. The damage was done , yet again. Our friendship has been full of lie but then I let go. But for all the 2nd chances, the hurt, the breach of trust it was time again. I sure wasn't in for such a rude behavior yet again. When I heard about the story I laughed. I just kept quite and listened to the entire tale. Though towards the end it did feel this story teller was being vengeful on X. lolMAX
Its sad that how people don't realize the worth of real people and keep lying. They base their relationships on lie. May be someone must have hurt you in past but that is no reason to pick up the same bad stuff and treat others in your life. Somehow with no offence but I see this behaviors a lot in people from small town or village. But then generalizing all for one is not right.
I've loved people pure and I know it comes back to me. For breaching the trust of a true friend is the biggest sin u can commit. So X lost the found again trust &  respect.And I will make sure I get all that I gave back. Don't ask me my game plans please... =) But not in cash here.
Because X doesn't make enough money. As X didn't pay for the drinks at the meeting with casting director. So I was told the casting director is never gonna approach X again for being so stingy.  They found this friend rude and sly.
Aah ! that resonates my opinion about my dear old friend. No work for X from those guys.. hmm... is Karma already acting ???
haha...

Almost A Year

It took me almost a year to realize I had stopped something I had begun. I received a mail from a stranger who said she liked my Article. I guess it kind of worked for someone atleast. Glad now I can die happily. But before that I have this few things I need to get right or rather get done. Like few friends I had stopped talking to. I took a bit of effort to get in touch with them you see.
More than a year back one of my friend happened to hack into my account to read my private mails. Well I hated it to the core. I mean how can anyone do such a thing of reading a personal mail. And then there was a series of moment I felt my privacy was thrown in air for all to see. I shifted to a shell. and got away with all these so called friends. But u know some really weren't at fault. But I had to move on and so I did. Almost a year passed and my life was different now. I had quit my beloved job out of frustration too.
When after so long I tried getting in touch with them they did respond. We had a good time again. But u know that was just one day. We hardly were the same old friends. Some said they have moved on which I till date don't believe. But they never did make an attempt to get in touch with me. Well, it hurts so bad.
But then God said LOUD  CLEAR---  Dude!!! Move On...
And I hear it more clear now. I left them behind but with a sweet note that said- U can comeback to me anytime.
Time passes so fast. Its been two years since I quit my job, Its a great feeling to have so much time pass by and not have realized it. I see so many changes. Beautiful ones. But what I see now is my outlook and my exposure and my knowledge has furthered. It always does right with time. Yes it does but when u cover yourself in a confined group of people it is way slower.
I see I reached further in life which otherwise I wouldn't have if I stayed there where I belonged. I mean God took a great decision for me and told me to do the right thing - To move on. It worked for me. He wanted me to see the world that I ones wanted to see without the usual restrains. I made awesome mistakes and emerged to become a different and better person, u see.
Looking out of my balcony at the blue sky I feel fresh and renewed. I remember why I had wanted space from them and had gone into shell. I wanted to grow which I remember seemed impossible with them. When I went back it was my way of saying sorry to them for an abrupt decision I made for my life. When I called them back into my life It was a way to see if those guys understood me. When they didn't turn up I realized they had moved on and weren't actually that great of a friend because they didn't wait. And when I moved on I felt a clear heart because I had done my apology part with truest of heart. Now its time I keep moving on. Life too short to have burdened heart and to live with it.
But well it all worked out after almost a year. Sigh !